Thursday, 23 September 2010

Complications

Why is it when you're closer to the finish line, the more things go wrong :/ Well I guess in my case its too much chemo for my body! And here I thought my body got used to it :(

Here's what happened, they put in the cannuala after boiling my arm, pushed the 2 injections of pre-meds (steroids/anti-nausea) and all of the sudden my vein aches like helllllllll, arm goes red, and the vein turns blue and you can see it from under the skin :/ ya not fun! They call the doctor she says the vein is no good, won't handle the chemo so gotta find another one, SUPER FUN! They find new vein, and give me chemo.. There on the right on twitter you can see pics of holes in my arm :(

Wait wait I'm not done! Exactly 8 minutes before my last chemo finishes my nose blocks up and my breathing goes to hell! Nurse runs and get other nurse, oxygen, and calls the on-call doctor (its 7pm). Apparently I had an allergic reaction so the pretty doctor (12 years old maybe) gives 2 anti-hestmin (or however spelt) injections :D just because all I needed was more meds!! Needless to say finished chemo like I was in a battlefield and barely got out of hospital standing..

Ya Rabi ra7mtik I just need to finish 2 more sessions for now.. Alah y3lam if I'll need more later but for now please see me through to the finish line of 12 chemos :( I'll go back to my hellish days, just thought I'd share this info with you so if there are any who's complaining about work, breaking a nail, or life. Should really put a sock in it and say il7amdillah!! Because after all this I'm still saying ALF ALF il7amdillah!

19 comments:

Random thoughts said...

Okay Foume, I get that you are going through a hellish time right now. But other people's problems are just as important to them, as your problem is to you.

FourMe said...

Yaaaaaaaah you're right! Fighting for my life is just as little of problem as anyone elses! Usually I let such comments slide by and don't give them a second thought BUT I've just taken chemo which means my anger is through the roof on top of my usual anger management issues!

So sweetheart not belittling your problems or anyone elses problems, but if you or others aint fighting for your life I suggest you put a sock in it and let ME vent in my OWN blog as I please!!! While I fight for my right to LIVE.

Thank you very much!

Anony said...

ya3ni you have the right to say whatever you want to say but she dont?

el mathal ygol lama etshof m9ayeb elnas et'hon 3alik mo9eebtik ..

enshallah na7sen elthan!

she didnt say their problems are not important. all she said is ..SAY IL7EMDELLAAH!



just for the record she asked me never to reply to any comment .. cause mashallah 7es elthan 3end elnas wayed .. bs keefi i will reply ..

and now im extremly pissed men kelshay bel denya so keefi im gona reply and im going to make a huge deal out of it! leave my loved ones alone la7ad ydoslohom 3ala 6araf! :@

o eli mo 3ahba ayshay FourMe etgola PISS OFF and dont leave a comment


7asbe allah wane3ma el wakeel 3ala kelman yse'e elthan o yathlem eb hal denya !

leiamra said...

You are absolutely right! Actually your posts makes me realize how trivial is the things I was making a big deal out of!

قولك الحمد الله في جميع الأحوال شئ جميل. سبحان الله منزلة الصابرين والشاكرين مش قليلة ابداً.

وَلَنَبْلُوَنَّكُم بِشَيْءٍ مِّنَ الْخَوْفِ وَالْجُوعِ وَنَقْصٍ مِّنَ الْأَمْوَالِ وَالْأَنفُسِ وَالثَّمَرَاتِ ۗ وَبَشِّرِ الصَّابِرِينَ ﴿١٥٥﴾ الَّذِينَ إِذَا أَصَابَتْهُم مُّصِيبَةٌ قَالُوا إِنَّا لِلَّـهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ ﴿١٥٦﴾ أُولَـٰئِكَ عَلَيْهِمْ صَلَوَاتٌ مِّن رَّبِّهِمْ وَرَحْمَةٌ ۖ وَأُولَـٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُهْتَدُونَ
-البقرة

I really wish you speedy recovery, and I wish you come out of this stronger than ever. Know that you are in this for a reason, a good one en sha2 Allah, so take it a chance to become closer to Allah, to learn more about him.

Anonymous said...

Fourme! Hello!
I opened ur post on my way home after going through hell at the dentist, they pulled out one of the most important teeth due to complications! I was crying oo mali 5ilg a7ad i didnt answer my fone wela kalamt ahali i went straight to bed cuz at that moment 7asait 5ala9 my life was over im this young and i already need dental plants! ooh and not to mention the blood hatha 9ij 5alani i just loose it! I started reading ur post, oo laman 5ala9ta istaw3abt how stupid and tiny my problem was.. Oo istaw3abt how huge ur was! Cuz kilmara i read ur posts ad3elich wi9er feeni yea thats bad, i didnt realize how bad ila laman i compared it to this stupid thing i went through and thought this world was gnna end!
Adre i blabbered wayyyyyed bs point is wala u gave me hope, ur truelly a hero being able to take all that! Oo trust allah inshala ma buga shay..alah yashfech inshalla oo iridlch 3afeeetich oo inshalla t9eren alf mara a7san min awal.. Oo 9adgenee this is all a test, 7ag emanich balla.. Oo dont loose hope.. U'll be done in no time inshalla;*

atoona said...

3asallah ysahhel 3alaich wehawwen 3alaihch ya raab!
ad3eelech eb salatee dayman. fofo ;**

Anonymous said...

Random thoughts I understand what you say, but honey you gotta have some empathy along with reasoning.

Yes, all of us understand how difficult any battle can get if things pin us down to a level where we desperately want to get up, but can't. Even if it means getting in terms with a broken nail.

The intention of the post was and is, be thankful in whatever state you are in, because things can get even worse.

I hope you understand what I said.

And please pray for FourMe's recovery.

Peace out everybody.

AlabasterMuslim said...

Yeah these posts definitely make me think, damn and i just complained because of THAT? I need to be constantly saying alhamdullilah. And like you said, YOU don't forget to say alhamdullilah because subhanallah you are going through such hard trials but allah swt could always test you with worse.

May allah swt grant you with a speedy recovery and if you have taken this test how he deems correct, may he grant you Jannah. Ameen!!

FourMe said...

Got a comment but don't know why not showing in comments!

" Fourme! Hello!I opened ur post on my way home after going through hell at the dentist, they pulled out one of the most important teeth due to complications! I was crying oo mali 5ilg a7ad i didnt answer my fone wela kalamt ahali i went straight to bed cuz at that moment 7asait 5ala9 my life was over im this young and i already need dental plants! ooh and not to mention the blood hatha 9ij 5alani i just loose it! I started reading ur post, oo laman 5ala9ta istaw3abt how stupid and tiny my problem was.. Oo istaw3abt how huge ur was! Cuz kilmara i read ur posts ad3elich wi9er feeni yea thats bad, i didnt realize how bad ila laman i compared it to this stupid thing i went through and thought this world was gnna end!Adre i blabbered wayyyyyed bs point is wala u gave me hope, ur truelly a hero being able to take all that! Oo trust allah inshala ma buga shay..alah yashfech inshalla oo iridlch 3afeeetich oo inshalla t9eren alf mara a7san min awal.. Oo 9adgenee this is all a test, 7ag emanich balla.. Oo dont loose hope.. U'll be done in no time inshalla;*

Posted by Anonymous to My Attitude at 23 September 2010 14:01 "

reemas said...

dear Fourme

u have all the right to write whatever u want in ur blog. period.
and we choose to follow u .. read u.. listen to u because we chose to care for u .
we feel u .. anyone of us could have been be in ur place.
we learn a lot about appreciating life and dealing with crisis by reading what u write.

thats what counts.
anyone else who choose not care.. let it be.
we don't care either.

God bless u dear.
الله يخفف عنج الالام
الله يعطيج القوه
الله يرزقج الصبر
و الله يمن عليج بالشفاء ان شالله
آمين
آمين
آمين

Social Butterfly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Social Butterfly said...

Maraat a7es ina way3 laysh 9ar chthy or laysh 9ar chethaak, oo mazajee yet3akar the daay kamel oo ya wayl ilee e7acheenee...

Ooo reading what you're going through and having to deal with people like THAT(Random thoughts)... and you still reply without losing your head just leaves me speechless...


Ever since I've been reading your blog I've realized ina nothing is worth it oo il7amdilla 3ala kil 7al... oo inshallah ya rabee everything we are learning from you klla ekoon fee meezan 7asanaatch...

Inshallah two more chemo's left oo etashaayfaayn yaa rab.. I may not know what you're going through, but dayman balee mash'3ool ma3aach.. Rabee eshafeech we3afeech wetredeen mthel awal oo a7san ba3ad...

and Please Never give up... Knowing that somewhere out there someone is fighting for their life just gives much more strength in a way...

You may not feel what you're doing to your readers bas wallah a7na ba3ad inta2athar...

Hugs and Kisses! (XOXO) ;*
Feel better!

helpme said...

السلام عليكم

تحية طيبة اخواني وخواتي بالبلوق
الموضوع الي بقوله اكيد غريب والكل راح يستغرب منه
لان موضوع مساعدة شخص وتدرون بالديرة كلها واسطات بواسطات
الموضوع ومافيه شخص يدور واسطة (ولو بمقابل مادي) وارجو من صاحب المدونة لا تلغي الموضوع لان والله العظيم (في حياة وممات اكررها يا اخوان فيها حياة او ممات )هالشخص وامه وابوه كبار بالسن وماله احد يرعاهم ومرضى بالقلب والعظام
وياريت واتمنى من الجميع الي يقدر يتفاعل بالموضوع لانه اول شي في تفريج كرب انسان الي يقدر يساعد لوجه الله او بمقابل مادي يتفضل وارجو كل الرجاء لا تلغي الموضوع وياريت لو يسمحون لي اضيف الايميل للتواصل او طريقة تواصل للي يبي يساعد
او يعرف الموضوع وبشكل عام الموضوع للاشخاص الي لهم معارف بوزارة الداخلية واكررها يا اخوان والله العظيم ثم والله العظيم الموضوع في حياة وممات شخص لان كل الابواب والطرق سلكه اخونا ونشرته موضوعه بالجريدة بعد وللحين محد رد عليه وما لقينا الا الواسطة ندورها ولو بمقابل مادي لدرجة مستعد يقدم كليته للي يساعده بهالموضوع
كلي رجاء يا اخوان تهتمون وبأسرع وقت
شكرا

Cat-Eyes said...

mabuga shay gorgeous, alah ysahel 3alaich enshalah.. i dont know if this is clear to u from everyone's comments but u really truly have impacted a lot of people's lives.. ur not a whiny cancer patient who's fighting for their life, ur much much more than that.. ur like a walking example of appreciating life, being thankful for the smallest things, having the will/ strength to live and actually fighting for it.. i also kow u cant see it that much lana god knows what ur going through and how weak u feel bainech w bain nafsech.. and trust me babe no one expects u to be strong bainech w bain nafsech, thats where u let things go lana only u know how u feel.. its the front u put on, el 7amd eli ta7medena, and even tho u fall/ lose hope u keep climbing back up with a stronger will to live.. u have no. idea. what that does to the people who read ur blog, walah akthar min mara en7a6ait eb stupid situations which normally wouldve made me cry and basically not have the strength to handle it, and i think of u.. and everything seems so small. ako nas e7sas;hom mayyet/ they lack sympathy or compassion, u know what to do about them? tell them to F off.. khal ewalloon honestly. and dont forget there are hundreds of silent readers that read and pray and keep themselves updated bas ma yetkallemon, so have much more support than u imagine.. kelna mawjoden and staying with u till the finish line, until u get every last strand of hair u lost.. we'll even count to make sure;p and i always say, if thats what chemo's doing to ur body it must be doing a hell of a lot worse to ur cancer cells.. fa el 7emdelah. i hope u feel better really soon.. waiting to hear from u *hugs and kisses*

Cat-Eyes said...

sorry bas raindrops ba6a chabde. honestly, what exactly did u think u would benefit from posting ur completely unsupportive opinion on the blog of a girl whose just had chemotherapy? el mushkela ena u dont even have a point, shallah 7adech? la w lech 3ain its the first comment. effin hell people like u piss me off.

Manal said...

:(
7bebty
allah weyach o eshafeech dear

Journal Entries said...

=*

Fahad said...

Allah ishafeech inshallah :*

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