The minute the word Cancer is mentioned in a conversation people jump to say 'kafena eshar' or 'Allah ya7fithna'. This is the norm, before being diagnosed I used to say the exact same words at the mention of Cancer. It is without a doubt a plague that people feared.
Yet now, after having battled it, it feels like a dagger to the heart. Every time someone says 'kafena eshar' I feel a knife shoved in my heart and twisted in a thousand times over, I feel a pain in my heart and deep down in my stomach. I feel like an outcast. Like I'm tainted with the scarlet letter C imprinted on my chest. I became one of those people plagued with the disease and shone. I'm ashamed.
I know the intentions of those around me isn't to wound me or anyone with Cancer or survived it. But believe you me it hurts to hear such words, even if they're a prayer to God to protect from such a destructive illness.
Am I being a Hypocrite? I used to be one of those whom uttered such fears, yet now I hurt from them and wish never to hear.
Maybe this is a pointless plea, but, for those conversing about Cancer around ones whom survived or lost a loved one to it, kindly say your 'kafeena eshar and Allah ya7fithna' in your hearts and not for those around to hear, as take it from me they are burning daggers to our hearts and ears.