Saturday, 13 February 2010

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See SEE this is why I hate going on my meds.. I become girly I become fucking girly and emotional over anything and anything.. Its like someone opened the floodgates of emotions.. I fucking hate it.. I watched Greys bitching Anatomy episode 14 and became a mess over fucking fictional characters! I felt the life being sucked out of my heart over a fucking character, can I be anymore silly! I cannot cannot do this I cannot be this goddamn girly I cannot be so soft I cannot be so emotional.. the tiniest of tiny things hit me to the core.. I WORKED VERY FUCKING HARD ON TOUGHENING MY MOTHERFUCKING CORE THANK YOU VERY FUCKING MUCH!!! I cannot have things weakening me.. I hate weakness.. I cannot be this mess I cannot be this fucking emotional I cannot control it.. I feel like a little girl and it feels pathetic I feel naked and stripped to the core.. If I stop my meds I suffer and if I take them I become this vulnerable girl.. I cannot be vulnerable I don't know how to do vulnerable.. I cannot be girly I cannot be!! it is simply unacceptable..

:(

6 comments:

Anony said...

:o ana akher shay shefta eps10 .. Ya 7asraat galbeeee khal akamel washof sheseeer

Average.Q8i said...

Hardluck ..

Faith said...

I watched Up in the Air last night and I woke up feeling like killing myself!
Let’s Watch Comedy and be happy :I

Danderma said...

4y... it's not being girly... it's being human... ur allowed to cry over Grey's eshda3wa it doesnt make you any less of a tough person

shofenee ana ... mako agwa mini goweya akhare3 el awadm...lakin la it7e6een li shay 7zeen or remotely romantic... ag3ad sa3at abchi... its more like... ok i get to be tough in real life but i have all those human emotions i have to release fa i release them this way rather than release them in real life... a trade off hon

ba6alah said...

el 7al eb eed Dr. Marwan AlMutawa'a :I

FourMe said...

anona:
nothing much in it but it just made me sad..
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average:
:/
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faith:
great.. i'll probably hang myself if i watch it!
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dande:
it is it isss dande it so is! i cannot be like this.. its not me :( ya i go all emotional over movies n stuff like that but now its gone overboard.. if someone tells me something remotely sad i become all freaking girly and start with the heartbreaking crap.. me no likey :(
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ba6alah:
got nothing to do with dr. marwan, its hormone medication thing and being over emotional..