Tuesday, 26 January 2010

Looking Down


Hello my name is FourMe and I'm afraid of heights :(
I've had this fear of heights forever and I'm planning on getting over it this year! Enough is enough I can't be this scary cat any more.. When I look down from a high place I literally feel my heart dropping to my feet and feel this shooting pain going from my feet all the way up to my head and after that if I don't step back from where ever I am I literally feel paralysed.. Yaa ain't a pretty sight.. I am that terrified of heights :/ Don't bother calling me a sissy as I already call myself that..

See from time to time I push myself to get over this fear yet I fail but this time I'm doing it for good..When I was 13 or so I stepped out of the window on the 7th floor onto the scaffolding set outside of the building, I went out of one window and back in through the other one having a mini heart attack midway, bearing in mind any dizziness would have caused my brain to splatter all over Baker St. I believe by that stunt I traumatised myself even more.. Next time I tried to have a go at it I was 16 or 18 and this time I thought water parachuting would cure it, yaa that was an epic fail as I kinda have a mini fear of the sea and things swimming in it.. Whole time I was up there I had my eyes closed.. When I was 21 I lived on the 20th floor for a year.. I think I stepped out on the balcony once or twice and that was just to look up at the moon and never down.. Needless to say I moved out to a house after that, gotta love ground floor.. The last time I tried to get over this damned fear was the STUPIDEST of all.. I decided hey this could be it so I walk out on the first deck of the Eiffel Tower and let me tell you I think I died up there just thinking of it I can remember how scared I was.. God I sound like a sissy! The second I stepped out of the elevator and looked at how high up I was I grabbed the nearest pole and went down straight away..

Here it is this is my Mount Everest, for the past 10 years I've been dying to go on the London Eye. Just looking at that picture above I get that pain in my legs :/ It is my ultimate fear because once you're up there there is no way down till the 30 minute ride ends! I cannot escape the capsule I cannot hide and there is no escape from the view.. Thing is no one wants to go with me they say I will throw a fit and embarrass them and end up causing a scene, which is true.. I know I will be terrified as hell and probably end up fainting but I MUST do this I must get over this fear because dammit I enjoy the sight yet I cannot look at it.. I really don't want to be afraid of heights no more :(

7 comments:

Anony said...

Really @@

Faith said...

Hey sisy yalla choose Bungy jumping or skydiving! One of those should heal you once and for all.

Danderma said...

4y?

i am going to ignore the two seemingly like suicide attempts you mentioned and let you know one thing...

London Eyes is so so BORING

you stand in line forever... you share a confined capsule with tons of ppl, who might not be very nice... who will stick their noses to the glass on all the best views while you have to hold back and fume or jump in between o suffer... intay o 7athech 3ad if they are smelly greasy or beautiful hunks and models...

o the views are of the gray thames o good old london monuments... y3ni something we have seen a million times but from another angel!

Totally overrated if you ask me
Bunjee Jumping however is AMAZING ;)

Look at my fears:
Fear of edges, Fear of swimming (Never Ever Swam EVER), Fear of all kinds of animals -more like terror actually-, Fear of confined places (i.e. a tanning capsule thing? i would go screaming)... mmm o bs :D

doona said...

my dad is like that

tekhayelay he cant stand on the open end of stairs or escelators ;P

ana kint shway, bas i kept pushing myself, oo al7en 3ady ;)

i do have PHOBIAS (yes phobias, not fear) of cockroaches, dentists and needles ;P

yes...said the future doctor ;P

FourMe said...

anony:
yup :/
==

faith:
woman you wanna kill me!!
==

dande:
suicide! were they?! hehe dande dandee if only you knew what insane things I have done .. it would truly be a "suicidal list" but I won't share :p

hmmm well you can take the private ride, plus cut the wait time.. I would probably do that so I can scream and yell without people thinking I'm a psychopath..

but I love the dull grim grey skyline :/ I see so much beauty in its grimness.. honestly its dark yet full of life.. not ur usual scenery of bright vibrant lively pretty colours..

aha ahaaa ME bunjee jump?? YAA RIGHT! and i have the animal/insects terror thingy as well..
==

doona:
have u heard the saying "baab enajar emkhala3" hathy entay :p how can u be a doctor and afraid of needles!

i had the fear my whole life but I got over it in the past two years from the amount of needles that have been jabbed into me :/

eleventh.st said...

My family always makes fun of me, lana im always ready to jump out of an airplane or do some crazy stunt..

but im petrified of needles!

Anony said...

bema'ani tawni agraa :P men mobile bs 6aal3 teh first line lool

khalas i'll go with u :D

me goo

me gooo

me gooooooooooooooo :P

you can make a scene i'll make one with you hahahahaha