Saturday, 20 June 2009

Can we be Mates?

I get the feeling I've already spoken about this topic.. honestly dunno can't remember anyhows.. Can man and woman be friends without the devil being their third?

Personally I believe so but some recent incidents are proving otherwise and it has been annoying me.. My best friendships are with men, I get along better with them, there is no drama, no bullshit, no crap that comes along with befriending a woman.. One of my longest friendships are with dudes, I've known one for 11 years, another for 10, two more for 7 years.. and so on.. all my best buddies I've known them for years and years.. some I'm in constant contact with them while others we're in touch here and there.. I can open up to a dude and spill my guts to him more than a woman.. Even with my best besssst girlfriend when I spill my guts to her she gives you that "look" that women give each other.. so ya I kinda stopped bitching to women cuz no matter how close they are, there is a certain glitch..

With my dudes, their gfs and wives know about me and know I am JUST A FRIEND and not a "threat" what so ever.. just a friend nothing more nothing less.. the boys call me to bitch and complain just like girlfriends do.. I probably know more about them then their other half's do..

I value the friendship of a man over the friendship of a woman anytime anyday.. They tend to be more loyal and they're there for you when you need them.. And I believe if you set limits and boundaries that are not to be crossed they will honour it except for the straying dog that everyman has in him that comes out once in a blue moon.. Now the thing is, many disagree with me and say a man and a woman cannot be friends without the sexual intentions! I hate that statement as it portrays both genders as animals.. Its is true in some cases while others its not.. I believe it depends on the person and what they are looking for and their intentions.. What do you think?


wicked said...

I've posted a comment on another blog for the same issue
and since hten, well my views haven't changed!
here's what i wrote under the name anonymous in big pearls' blog

"Define Friendship!
to me, A friend is someone who's faithful, reliable, enduring, needed, always in touch
it's not just someone whom you hang out with
it's waaay beyond that
A friend is someone who cares enough about you to listen to your struggles
A friend is someone upholds you through tough times
A friend is someone you can be yourself with
A friend is someone who loves you no matter what happens
I find it pretty hard to share such relationship with a guy without falling for him.

on a superficial level, yes !!!men and women can be friends.they can hang out together, they can talk, work, laugh together!

but they can never be 'good' friends, 'cause love always comes in the way , it could be one sided, it could be from both sides.
when you share a 'true' friendship with a guy, you'll find it so hard to put your emotions on a side especially if you 'click' well with that particular 'friend'

been there, done that, we're lovers now !"

Anony said...

I think I'm dead tored and need to shower, akhales o a3aleqe ;p

Anony said...

Meta meda yakteb kil hathaa :O

FourMe said...

U can't do all that without falling for a guy, but I can.. That's why I believe men and women can be friends.. love for a friend is different from the love for that special one..

I don't know, I honestly think it can be done, either that or it means I'm in love with four of my guy friends and vice versa :/ I don't think any woman is capable of loving 4 men in that special way! Damn just imagine :p

What have u been up to?! She she la tfashlena ma3a elmara

Um Mit3ib said...

a7san friendships with males:P

i agree :P

R.. said...

I do agree with u!
Ina it depends on the person itself!
Ya3nii ana I think! Mature men r better! Ya3ni in other words il teenagers aw early 20's kilish mi mal friendship! L2anhom immature! Ila ma nedar!
Oo ya fourme ib hal ziman mo mal u be close to any one but ur mom! L2anhom mo kafo! Bs rasmeyaat! Aw 7ta bestfriends! Bs never spill anything 4 them! L2ana asna3 bint bil dinya maradha ib taglib 3alich!
Oo slamatkom Oo it3eshon ;p

P.s. Anony shfiich 9ayra always late hal ayam? (a)

moi said...

my best friend is a guy too, i dont get along with girls, they r so selfish and drama queens and they hate me lol, i do have many gfs but my BESTEST friend is a guy and hes like a brother to me nothing less nothing more, ur right etha elwa7da kanat mo7tarama they would respect her

Âme said...

Natural attraction. Can't deny it.

It's the limits that define the crossing lines, otherwise the devil is on loose.

Many have it defined themselves or know the other's limits.

And those who don't know, cross invariably one time or the other.

~ Soul

Average.Q8i said...

The only friend that i spilled everything to is a female.
She can understand me, be honest to me.
She know how to answer things i always wondered about.
I can vent anything to her, without her complaiining.
We have our cheesy moments, Bess we never crossed the boundaries Nor have feelings towards each other.
I think friendship like these can happen .. and do happen:P.

Ahmed said...

No matter what, you have my maximal agreement. A friendship can exist without the attraction or sexual element. For a time I had two close female friends. Both have since passed away, but the relationships were the best friendships I ever had. Friendship is the core of everything. Love is a feeling that often comes and goes, people fall in and out of love throughout thier life, it's something that we can't control. Whereas friendship is true to ourselves and isn't dictated by uncontrolable emotions. Let me ask you simple question what if you admit that you have feeling for her/him ? will you betray that? won`t that ruin an otherwise great friendship ?

eleventhst said...

I agree with i have more in common with boys than with girls lool

and they are more fun and less sensitive! so more teasing!

Stand-Alone~ said...

i ado agree that men are more loyal then women when it comes to friendship and yes men can be bestfriends without the line being crossed!

Bent Aldar said...

Last year I wrote in my blog about the friendship between man and woman and I think:
يجب ان ننظر لبعض كبشر وليس كغدد و هرمونات ... لماذا يجب ان يكون هناك ذكر وانثي ؟؟لماذا لا نتعامل علي اساس اننا بشر؟.. انسان و انسانه ..يجب علي كل رجل و امرأه التخلص من االاوهام الجنسيه .. الرجل ليس حيوان والمرأه ليست اداة استمتاع ...

Cooookies said...

oppisites always attract

No identity.. said...

Yes YEs YEs ... No more No less.. :)

FourMe said...


not really some of my friends are younger than me by 4 or 5 years and we're just fine.. ya I agree trust is really hard these days :/

i got used to their selfishness and drama queen traits as they are expected from girls.. but what bothers me is when I'm their for them to bitch to yet when I need one of them they don't wanna hear it!

attraction is not always there.. I have friends whom there is zero attraction physically and mentally yet we're great mates..


define cheesy moments..

definitely friendship lasts longer than any other relationship.. answering your question, yes it does ruin the friendship because it will make one party feel uncomfortable..

its not about having things in common, its about understanding.. my bestfriend doesn't know heads from tales when it comes to football yet i adore him to bits..


9a7 elsanich!

no they don't..

no identity:

Anonymous said...

Okay I didnt actually read your entire post, but hun im 34 and tawny istaw3abt shay...i5theeha qa3ida...guys and girls can never be "just friends", there always has to chemistry between them even if its just from one side. take care love

projectkenya2011 said...

Eee... akeed it's possible!
As long as it's a mutual feeling on both ends! :)